Something beginning with M

Ladies! Quiet! If you'll look this way,
the diagram on the board explains
the raw, dirty process of extraction
of nylon from crude oil. Essentially
that thong you put on for the lads
is refined filth gripping your hips.
Turn to page twenty - put down that magazine,
look at me! I am not grading your handbags.
Pens down, everyone, and eyeliner pencils,
all eyes on the front. Try and focus
on the man with the outsize labcoat
robes of a magician. For my next trick

picture me naked:
white flakes flurry like a powder-puff discharge,
mole heads peek between lumps of dimpled skin,
nipples jungled in black vegetation.
Look at me -
if your foundation hasn't cracked,
I'm not being stark enough.

Homework: dust off your real face
and get used to wearing it. Now get out in the sunshine.
Today's lesson was on Me.